while i sit at home sick

i made a decision that this year's christmas gifts
were all going to be purchased from different
organizations. whether it be Invisible Children,
To Write Love On Her Arms, Save Darfur, or
whatever it may be... i decided that it would be
good for me and a better benefit to the organization
that my money go to them in exchange for a cute
t-shirt or bracelet or whatever and my money go
to a good cause...
cuz i think it is better than me spending my money
at sephora or some sort of cd or clothing store.
my mom just wanted me to donate money in her
name to the leukemia and lymphoma research...
in honor of one of my heroes caleb dominguez...
which was kind of a gift for me, too.
my dad just asked me to pick an organization to
donate to that i deemed reasonable to donate to,
so i donated money to the make a wish foundation
under his name.

my brother stuck to the selfish self that he is,
i mean, he's only 15 so i bought him concert tickets..
i kind of wish i had just bought him a TWLOHA t-shirt..
i mean, some of his favorite bands support TWLOHA anyway.

but whatever. this is my christmas of giving... not to just me
and my friends, but to people who will do better with the money
that is spent.

among that, i have a few other confusions and frustrations.

i need someone else's insight on that.. it'd be nice..
but yeah.

i'm off to bed again.
fevers make me sleepy.