oh my God shine your light on us

i feel like the lip ring makes my vicious face look more vicious :]
haha. ugh i'm so lame sometimes, i crack myself up.

last night i had to tell my life story to my growth group....and if you know me
and know my past.. it does not at all in the slightest bit come in a pretty
little package. and we're working together on a book called come with me
which is amazing... but i wasn't able to answer a whole section of it just
because i knew it would bring everything that i dealt with growing up
back to the surface... and i hate those times where i have to be vulnerable.
and those times where i am even brought to cry because all those scars
resurface... so i skipped forward in the chapter for this week and read on
about feeling weary... and then i realized that i love it when i can cry
and just stop and breathe... because i can feel God's arms wrapping
around me and cradling me. His gentle shushing...the fact that it's all
ok...

it's a stage of vulnerability for me.

and my normal reaction to this thing would be for me to put on this
tough as nails facade. but. God has been helping me tear down these
walls that i have built around myself for "protection" my whole life.
i'm afraid to get too close in fear of getting hurt. but... there comes
that word again. vulnerability.

so. here's to changes. and here is to me making no sense...
it made sense in my head.

vulnerability.

i kind of like it.

i love you.

the picture above is from my art show.

Art Show
Originally uploaded by thebestofwill

so, it was a brilliant success.
we sold out of tickets cuz the
administration capped us at
200, but i kept letting people
in free... and they in turn
donated the $5 admission.

we had a silent auction that
wound up being very successful
and the artists sold more work
which they in turn donated the
money to us which was sweet
of them... they could have kept
it as personal profit.

merch sold well.
the musicians were amazing.

and i, and very relieved.
project managing is hard...
especially when people only
half ass jobs and i have to fix it.

but alas, it is over, and it feels
like i am light enough to fly away
into the soft blue skies.

things are winding down for
me and i couldn't feel more content
and relaxed... now if only the weather
would get colder, things would
virtually be perfect for me.

but i can't have everything, right?

i love you.

Play'n Dress-Up

Play'n Dress-Up
Originally uploaded by annieK bananie

i have no idea what to be for halloween.
what are cute ideas?
i want to be something cute.
i am normally something gory
or super intense
but this year
i want to be cute.
cute cute cute.

i keep on falling

Lip Ring
Originally uploaded by Shannon Teresa

my friend heidi pierced her nose
yesterday. i talked to my parents
about me piercing my lip. they
said they wouldn't like it, but
that there wasn't much they could
do about it anyway. so now it's just
a matter of me getting money for it.

but i'm kind of really super excited
for it.

my brother's band did well last night.
they got a mosh pit. in turn, their
front man, grant, gave the audience
a lovely crotch shot of his tightie whities
since his pants split in the entire crotch
region...due to his spaz antics.

and uh...
i like the little baby penguins in the movie
surf's up...which i am watching right now
while blogging/writing my essay/being
distracted.

books to purchase:
the orphaned anythings
unchristian
.

love you.

one day i slowly floated away

"I volunteer to tutor the fledgling"
Originally uploaded by Sherri DuPree

my little brother and his band
have their second gig ever today.
and they're playing at soma!
i am so proud of this kid.
he's so talented! God truly blessed
him with a gift for music. although,
i think he totally dominates the universe
when he plays his saxophones.
yes, plural. :]

so i get to go to their gig tonight.
and i get to be his one invited guest
who gets to get in back stage.

:]

i love the kid. he's amazing.

well, off to pwn this essay.
the descriptions i use could
win you over in a heart beat.
<3

love you.

frisco

San Francisco at night, Twin Peaks
Originally uploaded by Steve W Lee

hello, san francisco
can't wait to see you
in january.

and i can't wait to
see cj!

:]

<3 love.
SO EXCITED.

oh, darlin'

Jamie Darling
Originally uploaded by rianflynn

once again, for the 6th week in a row,
my english teacher has taught us
nothing.

my child psych teacher cancelled
class after 20 minutes because
she said the weather was too nice
(indeed it was!)

i got to enjoy a nice iced chai
over at Cutter's Point yesterday

and got to go get mojito cookies
with Brad at Azucar in OB
(delicious desserts!)

and have dinner with Berlin
to catch up and enjoy each other's
company.

i swung by the coffee cart at the
ferry landing just to meander and
i saw Adi and Tom.

this week has been a week of
reconnecting.

doo doo doo dah doo doo

Launch
Originally uploaded by SARAΗ LEE

new schedule:
mondays: absolutely off.
tuesdays: school, intern, growth group
wednesdays: intern, college group
thursdays: school, evenings off.
fridays: mornings off, flood high in the PM...
fridays=negotiable.
satudays: absolutely off
sundays: mornings off, flood PM shift.

*sigh of relief*

yay.

:]

i can have a life again.

i love you.

i just keep on going and going and going and going

Plaça Catalunya - Barcelona HDR
Originally uploaded by MorBCN

i should live in a city that never sleeps.
cuz then i can literally just keep going
and going and going and going and
blah blah blah.

so today, i am going to try
and slow down, do what i can to
slow myself down just a bit
because i feel like i'm losing myself.

i don't know how to have fun anymore..
how sad is that?

anyway. i'm watching an episode of
the ex-list...and it's filmed in OB
and i laugh at the writing every five seconds.
because it's so cheesy, sex-infused, and pathetic.
but i watch it anyway.
cuz it cracks me up.

sad, yes? or no? do i have anyone to back me up?

and i'm going to punch whoever left me a note
in my cubicle that said "only attractive girls belong here"

if that was you, guard your package, because by
the time i am done with you... you and i will probably
be the same gender.

mmk.
bye.

weary

Originally uploaded by emily hunt

working for God is amazing
but also very, very hard.

i'm an introvert.
i have not had "me" time
in a very long time.

i tried to cut my hours so i
could rest, but alas...
someone always needs
something.

and my days off are never days off...
because someone needs something.
always.

thank you, ryan, for offering me
the chance to go up with you to
SLO for halloween weekend.

i look forward to it.

because i really need a few days
to escape and regain who i am.

isn't it sad that i don't know
what's fun to do anymore?

i.am.small

i.am.small
Originally uploaded by Jessie Marie>

computer off.
phone off.
door shut.
distractions out.
noise ignored.

silence.
stillness.

and He speaks to me.
and He is so loud.
and His voice surrounds me.
His voice is loud enough that
the deaf can hear Him.

be silent.
be still.

i need to learn to be that again.