locked

Quaint lock
Originally uploaded by Anastasia Larisa

my heart is getting locked up.
tightly to only which two people
have the key.

the first key belongs to God.
He will tell me when it is
permissible to open up my heart.
then the second key is obviously
mine... and only after i receive God's
ok, will i remove the second lock
and allow my heart to be shared.

still unsure of what's to be pursued....

and yeah.

:]

slow and steady, wins, right?

the unwinding cable car

so the only reason i decided to really watch this music video
was because luiken had said something about the questions
that appeared throughout it.

and after writing up all the questions... i decided to answer them.
they were pretty thought provoking.

the questions off of the new Anberlin music video
"The Unwinding Cable Car":

What makes us who we are?
Eyes?
i think that what makes us who we are is what we do.
the passions that we have in life, and the things we
take interest in. aesthetics can only define us so much.
they give people a physical image to remember us by,
but it's not like your eyes can tell someone your goals
and ambitions in life.


Who will you...
Love?
i will love God always&forever.
i will always love my family and friends.
i will love the husband that God has chosen for me.
i will always have a place in my heart for
those who are hurting&suffering.


Who will you...
Trust?
i will always trust God.
He will always be there for me to go to even in the
worst of situations.

Where is home?
San Diego.
and anywhere there is a beach or an ocean view
where i can look out to everything that is great and
so vast that God created.

What hardships will you face?
deciding what college to transfer to.
figuring out what i'm going to do after i graduate.
figuring out where God's calling is for my life,
my family, my future career.
having the patience to wait for the future
husband God has for me.
maintaining strength in my faith no matter
what the circumstance is.
& i just know that there's going to be so much
more. all i know is that i'm going to have support
no matter what, and i'm grateful for that.

What hardships will you overcome?
i hope i overcome them all.

What makes you happy?
God.
prayer.
praise&worship.
laughter.
the simplicities of life.
company.
someone's reaction to a simple act of kindness.
a hug.
a phone call just to say hello.
a text message to let someone know they were being thought of.
answering questions.
writing.
looking at everyone's view of the world through different forms of art.
adventures.
the list goes on.

What are your passions?
God.
helping people.
being around people.
...just people, i guess.
i love company, reactions, body language.
music.
reading.
traveling.
dance.

If you could... do it all over again...
what would you change?
relationships?
choices?
direction?
i honestly think that i would not want to go back
and change anything. every single thing that has happened to me,
which is A LOT... i don't think i'd be who i am now. every experience
has taught me something different... and for me being the head-strong
person that i am, it takes all sorts of experiences to make me learn things.
whether i have to learn it the hard way, or not.

i think it'd be selfish to say that i want to take out everything that was bad, imperfect, annoying, stupid, etc.

so to sum it up... i'd leave my life the way it's been so far.

What experience would you relive?
mm. i'm going to leave this question a bit of a mystery
cuz that story is kind of personal. but, that one experience
did help me fix something that was very broken in my life.

What will you achieve?
i hope i get to be a music marketer.
and have a side job, or at least volunteer to market
organizations like Invisible Children or To Write Love On Her Arms.
something helpful&meaningful that should be made known.

What will you be remembered for?
for being a strong Christian.
for having served Christ the best way i possibly could have.
that i lived a full life.
that i did something that helped change at least one person's life.
that i was kind&loving.

Don't Drop Your Arms

laughter

You don't stop laughing because you grow old.., originally uploaded by White_Lily.

last night church was great.
i'm so bummed that October Inc.
won't be playing there until
SEPTEMBER, but i mean, it's
cool that they're fulfilling a call
to do God's work, too.

&&also, i just now realized that
when they come back in september,
it'll be like a birthday present to me.
now that, is awesome.

haha. anyway.

after church, i hung out with quite
a large group of friends from UCSD.
i met more people, as always, and it
was pretty sweet. we all went hot
tubbing [except me, i didn't have a
bikini, but i stuck my legs in anyway]
and just hung out at luiken's and david's
apartment. the guy to girl ratio was
drastic... alisa and i being the only
ones of the female gender. i got to
see how extremely random scott is
[and let me say... it involves adding
"zar" to the ends of words... and
that's the least of it] and i also
got to learn more about those people.

james is teaching me how to skate
on thursday and that's pretty sweet.
and he, alisa, and i are all watching
across the universe, too. i am also stoked
for that as well. i actually have plans,
for once, for right after i get out of class.

le sigh.
can i give a prayer request?
to help with my decision as to
picking what school?
i don't think UC Berkeley is going
to be the right school for me.
academically, it's amazing... but
i don't want to leave everything and
everyone behind. so i'm now looking
at UC Irvine&SDSU.

love you.
God bless.

it's just whipped cream.

garsson2b, originally uploaded by rob964.

so today's shift was nice and short.
i even got let off twenty minutes
earlier than i was supposed to.
i was stoked.

and as usual, kylie, felicia, and i
were complaining about rude customers.
[i have to tell one of our regulars tomorrow
that he can't keep demanding $0.50 coffee..
and if he reacts meanly, i have to 86 him.]
anyway.

one lady flipped out at kylie today because
there wasn't whipped cream on her latte. well,
i had written up the cup and taken her order
and she never mentioned she wanted whip..
and lattes don't come with whip. and kylie
is preggers, so she's pretty darn irritable.

i asked what was wrong and the lady started
yelling at me.... we didn't really know how
to respond without being rude, and felicia
wasn't there...

but one of our other regulars looked at her
and said "lady, you're pitching an unnecessary
fit over WHIPPED CREAM. there is a war going on,
there are children in africa who are starving, there
are people who don't even know if they're going
to have dinner tonight... and you're treating them
as if they told you that they murdered your family.
it's whipped cream. so calm down. if i were them,
i would shoot the whipped cream straight into
your face and i would have banned you from
this store. but no, i don't work here. so ask them nicely
for some whipped cream and remember to ask
for it at the register next time. these ladies are nice
and they don't have to be nice to you."

i felt gob-smacked myself after hearing that, but
i was grateful that someone stood up for us.

i like our regulars.

now i have the rest of the day to myself.
and i don't have any homework.
what am i supposed to do?

le sigh. haha.
love you.
God bless.

p.s. i'm rethinking going to UC berkeley...
i don't think i want to go
that far away to a place
that's not exactly my top choice of
areas to live in. especially since
i'm establishing myself pretty well
down here and i have great friends
here and i don't want to leave everything
behind. so i'm thinking...maybe UC Irvine. :]

occupation

TREAT, originally uploaded by powerbooktrance.

my coworker and i feel
like we are the ones
that cover anything
and everything.

the ones who are always
depended on who get
pressured and guilted into
saying "yes" when we want
to scream "no"

i was supposed to have
a baby shift today of only four hours.
i got off hecka later than i was supposed to.

and on top of that, i spent a good hour
trying to get rid of a bird that flew into
the store. how it got into the store, you ask?
some customer swore it was like an oven
in the store and propped the door open
despite us telling that person "no"...
might i add it was only 40 degrees outside.

...people.
ugh. i've picked up so many hours this week.
and i hate how despite that i say that i don't
want to open all the flippin' time, i STILL get put
on the darn schedule to open everyday on the
weekends. or i close on a weekend and work
not that much later the next day.

i don't want my social life to go away.
oh... and now they're putting me on the
schedule for sundays. i told them i
wasn't available on sundays.

and i understand that we're understaffed
but seriously...

i'm just tired. i love my store. i love my
coworkers. i just don't love my hours,
and i don't like being guilted into taking
more hours than i need to.

oh well.
love you.
God bless.
peace.

happy hearts day

Paradise Island, Malawi, originally uploaded by netwalker.

happy valentine's day,
everyone.

i found the invisible children
video online today... so i
watched it.

and i know i posted something
about wanting to go on a
mission trip before, but it's like
watching that video made me
want to go even more.

and before, when i was considering
going on a mission trip, i only wanted
to go to europe... i don't know why i had
left out continents like africa and south america out
of the picture...

i think it'd be amazing to go on a trip
to spread God's love and share his message
in hopes of bringing more people to Christ.

hmm. we'll see.
:]

love you all.
happy valentine's day.
you're loved.
by me.
by God.
&so many more.

spread it!
peace.

purely awesome

talk about an awesome day.
i got an immense amount of people in my spanish
class to write "love" on their arms.
people in my statistics class had it written on
their arms, too... and it was pretty chill.

seeing the tons of people reppin' it over at
flood college just made my day complete.

asdhjksah fasdjska
i just cannot get over how amazing today has been.

making new friends.
spreading love like it's a contagious disease.
getting blue hair.
getting a phone call at almost midnight telling
me that i no longer have to work a double shift
on friday... :D SOOOO stoked about that!

just..
gah.
i can't even explain it.
today was simply
a-freaking-mazing.
thank you Lord, for making this day
absolutely wonderful.
for simply blessing it in
every respect imaginable.
you're an awesome God!

<3

i'm sleepy, now.
good night.
i love you!